Sunday, December 21, 2008

leaving on a jet plane?

a lot has been made recently about the lack of graciousness among the older generation of our population.

a significantly lower level of poverty that our people have enjoyed over the recent few decades have made this more obvious i think. we no longer have to fight for our lives to continue living so we fight for seats on the train and for the right to be as disgusting as we can in public. i'm not saying its all been easy peasy, we've all had our own battles to overcome but this comfort zone has bred a familiar pattern that you can use to define the different layers of our historically young society. its an everybody for himself mentality out there which is perplexing given the relative prosperity we've enjoyed. people don't seem to care what other people are thinking about them except when they know these people personally. of course i generalise but i find it sad and so freaking irritating at the same time. chasing the paper has made us somewhat piss poor morally (from T.I).

i have my own pet peeves and a younger me might have ranted endlessly about them right here but i'm not that young anymore and i'd like to think i've learned a bit so i won't. i just think that our generation needs something to happen to really build a Singaporean identity that isn't mired in all this negativity. i don't feel "uniquely" Singaporean personally and i could spend hours telling you what is wrong with our society, our soulless national identity or people who listen to music on their handphone on the bus without a earpiece but i could never imagine leaving this island for any other place to live.

this is where i grew up and to leave feels like i'm not playing by the rules however flawed they may be. a goal is only a wish without a plan right? well i've always had a plan, i just don't feel like sharing it with everyone all of the time. i've always felt bad to use loopholes or flaws in the system to my advantage except sometimes during NS and to let go of life here feels like giving up which is worse. maybe when i have a family and the direct responsibility over a new life then this idealistic thoughts would give way to something else. you make your own opportunities and if you fail or fall you just try again and unless you try it the exact same way, which is stupid, you're gonna take something different away from it. so until that day comes when i might change my tune i'm just gonna keep trying.

so here's to trying again in 2009. the end of 2008 has justified my choices a little bit. then again i've learnt now that its not about justification, its how you adapt without going against your priciples. thank you for reading my thoughts from this year. =)

-dib- at 1:50 AM